I haven’t blogged in a long time, let a lone I haven’t been on tumblr in a long time. I’ve lost lots of followers which suck but oh well! Their loss ;) Anyways I’ve decided to blog and get back into writing because, one- its a great way to get my thoughts down and express things that I can’t outloud. Two- my mom recently got me a counselor, Dr. Doni Kwak. Haha, kwak kwak. Last monday was my third time seeing her and I only see her once a week for an hour. Shes pretty cool, she’s asian and reminds me of my US history teacher which weirds me out a little bit but on the other hand she’s very good at communicating and I seem to be able to just tell her things and be open.
The second day that I went to go see Doni, she gave me homework. I know what you’re thinking.. wtf, homework?! But it was like mental homework…if you get what I’m saying. She had me go home and over the week practice concentrating on my breathing, the pattern of my breathing, how fast how slow. And also, think about what my goals were. Not just for my goals like what I want to do in life, but my goals that I’m trying to complete by going to see her.
That whole week I totally forgot to concentrate on my breathing, but who does? Breathing is like an automatic thing. But recently I have realized when I get mad, if I think back to my session with Doni I take deep breaths and it actually helps as a matter of fact. So my third session with Doni, I came back with goals in mind ready to tell her. My goals that I wanted to complete by agreeing to see her were to build the confidence I’ve lost back, and to better the relationships with myself and others I love around me. Yet I still don’t know how I’m going to do those things, I’m really gonna learn how to get this self control thing down.
Now, as to why I am actually writing this and publishing it on tumblr when probably no one will even read this.. was because of my homework last monday. My counselor Doni, told me that I should start recording how I feel everyday on my blog or record anywhere on a scale of 1-5 or smiley faces haha. I told her I have a blog and she said I should record it here, so I said why not. I actually really do like to blog, its therapeutic and someday when I’m older I’ll go back through this blog and get to read everything weird I posted about.
Todays rating: :)